It’s a new dawn
It’s a new day
It’s a new life
And I’m feeling good – Muse
I had been following the Eroticon blogs and website for some considerable time as it both intrigued and beguiled me. Although people can perceive confidence, confidence can be transparent and a mask for the insecurities under the surface. That is me, I work hard to allude to it but am the jellyfish quivering in reality. This how I viewed me attending Eroticon and the fear overcame the desperation to go. However my hand was forced in one way by Molly and her thoughtfulness and kindness and Sheets of San Francisco offering me a sponsor ticket for the Sunday. I thought sod this Becs, in for a penny in for a pound and therefore purchased a ticket for the Saturday as well.
Friday night saw me meeting with Earnest having a nerve steadying drink before moving onto Camden Town, directions duly dispensed by E knowing my propensity to go totally the wrong way. I arrived early and for the second time in my life drank alone in a pub. The fatal mistake was ordering both a gin and tonic and red wine, a lethal combination so in essence I was on the verge of drunkness. I met Eye a fellow blogger who I have met before, and then we went to the meet and greet. Eye is extremely confident and knows a lot of people so she breezed off to reacquaint and chat. To be honest I was terrified of meeting Molly , a successful blogger, photograph and all round success. My vision of her was tyrannical and I had this misconception of the person, as when I met the effervescent delightful fireball that is Molly, she is the antithesis of my imagination and her and Michael made me feel welcome as I collected the delegates badge. I can honestly say we all appreciate the sheer hard work, Molly, Michael and Girl on the Net put into the event. I cannot judge the scale of the effort, stress and frustration they must of encountered, but the whole event ran smoothly and was so well organised it appeared seamless, they did us all proud. I fess up I stayed for about 15 minutes at the meet and greet after being kindly bought a drink, before I scuttled off home, terrified and wondering if I would be returning on the Saturday. The room was filled with confident people talking about their Kinks and it was obviously a lot of people knew each other which made being a “newcomer” slightly difficult and I retreated after spending time with a Dom staying at our hotel, as in reality I do not really have a Kink. Earnest and I are building on a domination theme but it has always remained on the periphery of our meetings.
Saturday. The day dawned slightly damp but tinged with an air of expectation. I kicked my butt out of bed early and dragged myself my suitcase and laptop bag up to London. After a fortifying Costa coffee I made my way to Arlington House , a fantastic institution that provides homeless people a new direction in life. Fortunately the Eroticon conference was well signposted and cheerful staff members also pointed the way. From then on I was mesmerised, excited, nervous and anticipatory all rolled into one. I was so excited I could of wet my pants (knickers, briefs, panties to reflect the nationalities that attended Eroticon of which there were many). Glorious goody bags awaiting us filled with the delights from various sponsors. Among the treat were chocolates and condoms, little booklets and wonderful mugs from Fuck.com sex positive dating and Girls on the Net plus t shirts from Fuck.Com and Hot Octopuss a real treasure trove of delights. The day started with a panel Sex in the Mainstream Media. Unfortunately due to my wanting to curl into a ball and hide I could not see or hear the panellists which was a shame as I felt the content due to the ripples of laughter and comment from the front to be interesting. Lesson learnt. I had scoured the information packed conference handbook and chose the next event to be a talk by Meg John Barker. Fascinating and challenging my viewpoints immediately. It also gave me a chance to speak to some other delegates. I have subsequently used google to find more work to read purchase and enjoy by Meg-John Barker. Although I had trepidation I was beginning to feel more relaxed although coffee and mingle was a phone call time for me. The next speaker was an affable jovial Myles Jackman. A fascinating subject which will affect all bloggers and sex writers to a certain extent. The government must be pushed to clarify and allow people to be adults if they so wish. I then decided to go to Michaels workshop and therefore missed what I believed were incredible talks by Girl on the Net and Victoria Blisse, next year both will be earmarked. Unfortunately I came to Michael’s session late and for some reason could not connect my laptop to the internet so sat and listened. Michael incredible knowledge was imparted and to be honest I am gutted I could not get involved in the session nor be there from the start, so I am non the wiser regarding this wordpress. This blog was created at my request by a past lover and friend Leo, who had his own blog I guested on Nurturing our desires (for some reason he no longer adds to this blog shame) and I am extremely grateful but it does mean I do not have a clue regarding maintaining and running a blog. I feel a paid session might be in order but over the past few months my interest has waned in writing, I find I enjoy reading other bloggers more.
An excellent lunch was provided by Chaturbate such variety and choice. I sat in the corner and did not want to talk so went on my phone but the wonderful vibrant gorgeous funny Modesty Ablaze started chatting. I adore her Sinful Sunday posts and look forward to getting to know her better in the future.
Afternoon passed so quickly. An entertaining yet very informative talk by Ashley Lister regarding Plotting Stories provided a lot of fun. Twitter was awash with our “six words” stories among others. This session passed in a blink of an eye. Then came one of the highlights of Eroticon for me the wonderful Kate Lister and her funny yet knowledge imparting talk A history of Erotic Writing and Obscenity in Britain. Her very very successful Twitter Account and website is a testament to her wealth of knowledge. After coffee what came was another highlight Djfet rope workshop. I am useless with ropes and was surprisingly satisfied that I learnt how to tie a slipknot. A great fun workshop and I partnered with the most beautiful person Aurora Glory we were both a bit hesitant about “touching” each other but still managed to have fun. I cast my eye around the class and all I could see where people thoroughly enjoying themselves whether strangers or friends, it was a real sense of community and most of that was down to the person who perhaps inspired me the most this weekend Djfet. Her positive attitude was incredibly infectious and her ready laugh yet ready soft harshness a contrast indeed.
The final stage of the day was the wonderful social event at a pub, in our little sectioned off area we were regaled with humour and dance and stand up comedy. Coupled with a rather delicious burger it was ending up all in all a terrific day. I met in person finally Bibulous One I have read his blog posts and Sinful Sunday posts mesmerised by his Kinks which cause me at times to wince, laugh and consider! We chat quite frequently via twitter and I have found a fellow friend and he is one of these people I can just chat too. I was lucky to be in excellent company and found myself with 19 syllables; this woman is as wonderful in the flesh as she is in prose. A truly embracing warm person. Exposing 40 another inspiring female who gave her company freely with fun thrown in; and the gorgeous sexy Maria. I wish I had the chance to spend time with Maria, I just felt an affinity with her. The evening was rounded off with a delightful night stay with Eye who generously gave me a bed for the night, kindness personified. I sat whilst on my phone, listening to a conversation between Eye and another Eroticon hotel resident discussing dom/sub relationships. Another learning curve for me.
Sunday meant not such an early start and after a fantastic breakfast of bubble and squeak, with a poached egg coated with hollandaise sauce and accompanied by bacon, day two started. Once again I chose Kate Lister talk on sex work. A sometimes thought provoking talk handled with humour. A wide selection of vintage photographs both from home and abroad and I left with a knowledge of several risqué in their times odes.
Pre start meant I was able to have a laugh with Ina Morata her humour matched mine especially since we were stoking up Alun I would like to meet these two before next year as the wave lengths appear the same. I also had a very brief but enjoyable hug with Tabitha Rayne she gives out sexiness and gorgeousness that one does. I also had the pleasure of meeting Eve Ray her legs were gorgeous as was proved by the pictures being taken I think of people at Eroticon’s shoes.
My final session was with the absolutely delightful Kink Craft whereby I made a cane. Their patience was outstanding and from bare basics my item of beauty began to be created, a cane was forthcoming. Okay so I lost patience and lost my way a bit but the wonderful patience of the team meant I came away with a functioning useful addition to my play box. Instead E and I tried it out with painful success the following week.
Lunch was once again an assemble of treats and delights which left me stuffed. I then made the decision that it was time to collect my belongings and return home to my normal life. I so wanted to stay and do indeed regret not staying for Rachel Kincaid excellent session. I had mentally decided not to stay for the reading sessions, it is my inability to have believe in myself and listening to other reading from their most excellent blogs causing me to retreat into my “useless” shell. From what I can gather it was a fitting end to the whole Eroticon weekend. So off I trundled to the home counties feeling liberated energised yet exhausted. On the way home I pondered the ones I wanted to talk to but could not approach and hope one day I might be able to make their acquaintance, I never met girl on the net or other big hitters, and obviously there were cliques of people who stuck together as they knew each other and entertained each other and one would not want to venture into that circle especially if you feel that you would squeak a stupid comment. But my fellow Eroticon attendees you made it brilliant, from the store holders who wares I thoroughly enjoyed and purchased from Ceramic Pleasures among others, to conversation with store holders such as fuck.com it was a weekend to remember. Upon reflection there were so many workshops I wished I had attended and the choice was too difficult. Being a novice it is hard to judge which ones are the most suitable for yourself, it is a learning curve. I will take a lot of positives from the experience plus a few personal negatives. 1. The fact I did it, I attended 2. Meeting some wonderful people 3. Learning that sex blogging is global 4. Learning that people do not judge 5. Learning that this is a very clique environment 6. We don’t come with three heads screaming Kink 7. My knowledge is minuscule and there are kinks I had never heard of such as “age play” 8. I can disagree yet agree. 9. We don’t have to hide underground 10. Talent, this was abundant in every person I met.
EXPOSURE – Apart from the challenge of placing my beautiful ceramic pleasure dildo and taking a picture at work which I did successfully I also took my Girl on the Net mug to work to use daily. However I bought it home last weekend to be cleaned in the dishwasher. I had every intention of returning it to my work bag after the dishwasher cycle finished. Instead in ended up in the mug cupboard. Sitting in the front room on a Sunday evening I received a Whats App from my daughter, WTF is this all about enclosing a picture of both the mug and Girl on the Net website. Fast thinking meant I leapt upstairs as fast as my creaking legs let me and said “Oh **** from work who is very forward thinking and out there brought them all in for International Women’ Day” and slunk out of the bedroom backwards practically forcing the mug from her hands until she protested it was still full of tea…………………….